As you point out in your question, when it comes to discussion about important matters, passionate debate is part and parcel of Jewish discourse.  Yet, both in the Torah itself and throughout rabbinic literature there are numerous examples that demonstrate how important respect and honor are when having such debates.  In each of the codes of Jewish law, for instance, there are rules for how one should conduct oneself in public speech so as not to offend the honor of another.  The concept is that one can passionately disagree with another’s ideas while still respecting their humanity and dignity as a fellow human being (Kavod Habriyut).  In fact, the former is conditional on the latter.  “Elu v’Elu Divrei Elokim Hayim” – “These and these are the words of the living God”.  This verse is taken to mean that when both parties are arguing for the sake of heaven (l’shem shamayim), the result of such a debate, even if it results in disagreement, is holy.  When we debate properly our tradition sees it as a sacred endeavor; when we do not, when our discourse lacks civility and higher purpose, such debate is simply destructive.  The best example of this in rabbinic literature is the debate between the great sages, Rabbi Joshua and Resh Lakish, during which Rabbi Joshua regrettably insulted Resh Lakish’s character.  The Talmud essentially tells us that Resh Lakish died from the insult and that Rabbi Joshua never recovered from the loss and tragedy of what his insult had set in motion.  Two great sages were in essence ruined by disrespectful discourse.  On the other hand, our Talmud contains pages and pages of debates and differing opinions where even the opinion that was not accepted was respectfully recorded for future consideration.  It is to this ideal that we strive.